This week, I finally get out of FB jail. For the last 30 days. I’ve been kicked off the site.
It’s pretty amazing what can change in 30 short days. Before I get into all that, let’s talk about the back story here…
Two months ago, I was quickly reaching my wit’s end. My stress levels were at an all-time high. I had recently overhauled my entire business and made some major changes. One of those changes was that I was selling a $7.95 product when I was used to selling $5,000 products.
There’s a different type of consumer that gets a $7.95 book versus someone who spends $5,000 trying to make the most of their life. I was not used to the $7.95 crowd. My entire career I’ve said, “Don’t sell to broke people,” and I never imagined broke people would be buying my shit. That wasn’t my intention.
My intention was to get my product to as many people as possible to help them. I didn’t realize this would shortly become the single most frustrating launch I’ve ever done.
The kangaroos came out in full force. I’ve had maybe 25 charge-backs in my 7-year career. At prices of $5,000 and more. Yet with a $7.95 product, I was getting 2-3 charge-backs a day. The small mindedness was almost too much for me to handle. People would message me saying I stole $8 from them lol.
I wanted to smack them, then smack myself for fucking with them in the first place.
The stress got so high that I reached out to an old friend, Christopher John Stubbs. He gave me some advice on what to do and I did it.
Two weeks later, I found myself in the middle of the Utah mountains. I went on a spirit journey (long story) and while I was in a trance a message was given to me. The message was:
“You’ve let Facebook consume and control you. It’s time to get off.”
The next day, after the trance was over, I woke up to a message from someone on Facebook. Then another message came right in. Both were from people saying that someone from our group called their boss and told them what they posted in the group.
This fucking infuriated me.
I made a post in the group about it and ended the post with “If you’re a grown man who calls someone’s boss and hurts their family because of shit posted on Facebook, kill yourself.”
Apparently, “kill yourself” is a trigger phrase for Facebook and they kicked me off for 30 days, no questions asked.
Normally, I’d be all beat up and upset about it. But with what I’d learned while in the trance, I was actually looking forward to it. My stress levels were way too high. I wasn’t enjoying my time on the site. There was too much bitching, politics and shadiness going on anyway.
I also know that it takes 21 days to break a habit and this was going to be my big chance to break a habit that I could never have broken alone.
This was the cosmos intervening to help me get what I wanted.
I returned home, in Facebook jail, ready to explore some new things, reduce my stress levels and focus on things I hadn’t had a chance to focus on. Like myself and my family.
The first few days it was odd. I felt like I was missing a piece of my identity. I had no comeback gratification, which is something I was totally used to. This made me realize how much I was really relying on the site. It’s kinda scary now in retrospect.
By day three, I had found other shit to do. I spent the first two days looking for a flip home. Something I had been putting off for weeks. By the end of day three, I had a contract on a house. The 4-5 hours each day I spent on Facebook had been replaced with me running comps and making offers on homes.
Exactly one week from being kicked off, I had bought a flip home, had the layout designed and construction underway.
On top of that, I had all this extra time that allowed me to connect and make extra sales. This led to me leasing a 2017 F150 FX4 for my flip business.
Two weeks into the ban, I was making daily trips in my new truck to the flip house. I’ve learned firsthand, from the workers how things work. I pick shit up quick by asking a lot of questions. I’ve worn them out with questions about how stuff works.
About this same time, two weeks in, I realized my stress was way down. I hadn’t lashed out, yelled at my family or been in a bad mood. Facebook was truly the source of my frustrations. The goddamn site had me feeling triggered 24/7. That’s no way for me to walk around.
Three weeks into the ban, my flip home is 70 percent renovated and I’ve been there every step of the way. Turns out, the flip house gives me new problems to fix. This keeps me from needing to break shit just so I can fix it again. Combine this with a lack of Facebook and my stress is almost gone. I’ve even been smoking the ganja less and less because I don’t need to calm myself as much.
On top of the flip house coming along, I also had my lawyer create two new businesses for me and I’ve already made sales for one of them.
The extra time gave me the ability to get clarity on a few things. I created two businesses and got them running—in the time I would normally spend answering questions on Facebook.
This made me realize I was too accessible and giving too much of my time to Facebook. That part of my life ended 30 days ago.
During these 30 days, I also spent time on LinkedIn. I made quite a few sales, new connections and I fell in love with the site. There are no politics, all professionals and when people message you, they are less likely to be a kangaroo.
I’ve also stopped working by 4:30pm. This made me stay on track all day and since I didn’t have FB to distract me, I got 10X the shit done. Each day after 4:30pm, I’d spend time with my family. One night, Amy and I had floor seats at the Mavericks game. We sat next to Tony Romo and watched Dirk score his 30,000th point. You didn’t see it on FB because I didn’t post it. Which proves that just because it didn’t happen on FB doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.
In the last 30 days, I also got back to being Ryan. Facebook went all cuck on me and started censoring me. This made me lose my edge. I stopped cussing in my posts and my articles and fuck, it was eating me up. I also started giving a shit what people thought of me. I actually was getting soft and defensive.
Fuck that. That guy is dead too. I’m back, bitches.
I’ve had extra time to be productive. I’ve had extra time to think about myself and who I was becoming. I’ve had extra time to enjoy the life I’ve worked so hard for. As far as my FB habit, It’s broken!
I’ll be back on Facebook, but I got a plan this time. I’ll no longer be accessible and I’ll never have the app on my phone again. I don’t need it. My business didn’t skip a beat without it and matter of fact, it thrived more.
Now, I’m not bashing Facebook. I’ve built 99 percent of my business from it. I know the value. Hell, I’m even an investor in the company. (I own stock). The thing is, what if I’d have relied solely on Facebook for business? I’d have been fucked in the last month. Instead, I was smart enough to build an email list over the years, as well as my other social media channels. Never put all your eggs in one basket.
These backup assets saved my skin. If you rely on Facebook for all of your business, you need to be capturing leads from the site and building your own assets as well. Facebook is known to kick people off without warning. They delete huge fan pages, kick users off and ban advertisers. It’s a weird ass site.
So, this Tuesday, Facebook lets me back on again. I’ve got a plan to spend less than 30 mins a day on the site. I’m not going back to stressing myself out again. That shit wasn’t worth it. No more arguing, bitching and moaning for me. Keep that shit.
I’m trying to do big things. I can’t do that with small people.
Moving forward, my focus on Facebook will be my paid membership groups, the fan pages I run and the sales talk group. That’s it. I’m no longer going to be on messenger at all. If folks want to interact with me personally, I’ll be giving my personal email to clients. If you want interaction with me, it won’t be through Facebook anymore.
Life is too short to spend triggered from some fucked up social media site. Facebook has turned us into boiling frogs. It started out as a cute site to connect with friends. Then we started arguing over politics. Then fake news emerged. Then fake trending news. Then name calling. Then just hatred and complaints. It was killing me, and the universe intervened and helped me.
When’s the last time you took a break from Facebook? Here’s something cool to consider; stop liking, commenting and clicking on stuff. Keep scrolling the newsfeed for a few weeks without clicking or engaging. Just observe. You’ll notice your feed get cleaned up and the negativity gone. Stop engaging with negative shit!!!
If you’re looking to be a part of one of our paid masterminds (the groups I’ll be active in) then you can get information and sign up at www.breakfreeacademy.com/entourage