Salespeople Are Fed Up With People Asking Us “Sell Me This Pen” Here’s Why

Posted on May 01, 2016

Ryan Stewman



You know that scene at the end of Wolf of Wall Street, where Jordan Belfort says “sell me this pen”? Yeah we all do. And guess what? We are over it! The movie came out in 2013. That’s three years of people hitting us with the ultimate sales cliche. STOP  IT!
Here’s the deal… most of us don’t sell pens for a living. Therefore, we couldn’t give two sh!ts about selling a pen. Matter of fact, unless it’s a Mont Blanc, none of us have any business selling pens, one on one, anyway. We sell stuff that costs way more than pens. Like cars, homes, equipment, consulting etc…
Being in sales is mentally exhausting. If you’re not in sales, you have no idea how tired we are when the day ends. It takes tons of brain power to deal with objections, be creative, and to stay persistent. Selling on a daily basis takes a lot out of you, and we salesfolk ain’t trying to add more work to what we already have.
The last thing any of us want to do, is sell something that isn’t paying us a commission
Have you ever met someone new, and then when you tell them you’re in sales (always tell them you’re in sales) and they hit you with “sell me this pen?” It’s happened to me several times. It never gets less annoying. Especially when it comes from some dude that’s a Harold from HR type. “What are we doing here Harold?” 
I’m the admin of this group on Facebook called “Sales Talk with Sales Pros” and it’s about 20,000 strong at this point. When you join the group, you’ll see a set of rules on the right hand side. They are pretty, easy to follow. The first rule says “Don’t ask us to sell you this pen” we ain’t got time for that sh!t.
I’ve seen a lot of job interviews where the manager asks the applicant to sell them something mundane.  I personally think this is a waste of time. When someone applies for a job selling my stuff, I want them to pitch me on selling my stuff; not something that’s irrelevant. What if the applicant can sell you a pen, but can’t sell anything else?
I get it. It’s fun to ask the question and see what people’s responses are. But it’s been three years now! Could you imagine if people were still singing that song “let it go” from Frozen? ‘Let it go’ annoys you, as much as asking us to sell you a pen, annoys us. Also, asking us to sell you a pen, only shows you lack in originality, and timing. #RookieMove
Asking us to sell you a pen in 2016 is like filming yourself doing the the ice bucket challenge
Going back to my Facebook group, every now and then someone doesn’t read the rules, and they post “sell me this pen” in the group. The #SalesSavages in the group light them up. Here’s why: We would rather help someone sell what they sell, then talk about some mythical pen. We don’t even have all the facts.
What’s the price?
How’s the quality?
What kind of pen is it?
Instead, people who post in the group with things like “I sell XYZ. What’s a good way to pitch this to XYZ prospects” get the best possible answers, that any smart salesperson could come up with. Isn’t that a much better use of one’s time and posting effort? We all benefit when that happens, we don’t benefit selling pens or other mundane objects.
I can sell anything. I’d rather use my skills to help a person in a real world situation than a hypothetical one. When I spoke in front of a crowd of 1200+ at Russell Brunson’s Funnel Hacking Live, I had guests line up at microphones and give me their biggest objections. I spit out rebuttals with rapid fire. This helped hundreds of people in the room. If I had talked about selling pens, there would have been no value. And damn sure, no fun. 
If you’re looking to sharpen up your sales skills, I highly suggest you invest in yourself by purchasing my Show Up and Close sales training program. Give me a few minutes a day, for only 60 days of your life, and I’ll take your sales skills to a whole new level, you never even knew existed. You think you’re good now? Imagine how good you’ll be with a little help from me.
Lastly, if you’d like to know more about what we sell over here at Hardcore Closer and how you can buy some of it, click on the banner below this and fill out the form. We’ve got programs that can help you sell, advertise and market, with prices ranging from $10 to $50,000. We can help pretty much anyone. Anyone but kangaroos.
Oh! Last thing. If you’re tired of people asking you to sell them a pen, share this on social media.

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