Why You Can’t Always Expect Others To Clap For You

Posted on December 26, 2020

Drewbie Wilson



It is human nature to want someone else to clap for you when you achieve. I’m not exactly sure what the technical term for it would be or if it exists, but it can be recognized in many areas.

Growing up, we want our friends and parents to clap for us when we get a good grade or score a sports goal. As we’ve gotten older, our desire for recognition does not go away, and it merely shifts into a different area that we seek such applause.

With the invention of social media and the “like” react, humans have become addicts for engagement.


Like a junky craving their next fix, we regularly check our phones for notifications and that hit of dopamine we get from someone interacting with us. It’s scary to think about when you realize just how dependent we’ve become on the engagement of others for happiness.

One of the things we coach people on in our Apex program is using social media to attract potential clients and build brand awareness for yourself and your business. Part of that process includes posting consistently across different platforms such as Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, etc… Each of these platforms has millions of visits per day. Millions of people seek that same hit of dopamine they get from engaging with others’ content and having their content engaged with in return.

It can be a bit daunting for many at first.

If you’re not used to continually using social media to share your life and content, the idea of doing so can be overwhelming. You don’t want strangers knowing your every move or some weirdo to creep your stuff. Guess what? It happens to everyone. You just have to be smart and use a proper strategy that keeps your information private while still sharing your adventures and personality with the world. People buy from people they know, like, and trust, so if you’re not building that relationship early, you’re going to struggle to build your business. Again, the secret is using social media intentionally and with a strategy. Check out my other blog HERE to learn more about using social media with intention. Once you get over the initial nervousness of posting consistently on social media, you get to the next significant roadblock, which is where this article was initially discussed between myself and some of the other bloggers on this site.

“You Cannot Expect Everyone To Clap For You.”

As you begin to create more content and build a following, you will start to see an increase in social media engagement. You’ll start to see what messaging works well and what sort of content get’s less attention. Like everyone else, you will begin to crave that attention. Not because you are egotistical, but because you know more engagement equals more potential sales. Likes and engagement become a success metric.

Then what starts to mess you up is when you realize that the algorithms for each of these platforms evolve and changes on a moment by moment basis. What worked for the last month suddenly gets a fraction of the engagement that it used to.

Is it ad fatigue?
Is the audience bored with the messaging?
What did we do wrong?

You’ll start to second guess yourself and wonder why your numbers are down. The lack of dopamine will send you into withdrawals, which will lead to stress. Extra stress causes a whole host of other problems in your business. Can you see the vicious cycle?

One of the most common things I talk about with our clients when these situations come up is how often this can happen and why it’s more important to share the message than worry about the metrics.
My typical posts get anywhere from 30-100 engagements. However, there have been multiple occasions where I poured my heart out writing a post about a specific topic, spending an hour or more on getting my point across clearly, and gained five engagements. If I were to let that keep me from writing another post, I’d be accepting that my success relies on other people’s approval.

You don’t need anyone to tell you whether or not you did the work. Only you can make that decision at the end of the day of whether or not you gave it your all.

So whatever you’re going through in life right now, whether it’s a lack of engagement on your social media content or the people in your circle just aren’t showing up for you the way you think they should, it might be time to step back and remember who you’re doing it for!

You control your destiny, and the sole responsibility for your success falls on you.

When you get the right people around you that motivate you to work harder and inspire you to keep going when things are tough, you become an unstoppable force. You won’t need the validation of others because it will always be there inside of you. However the right group of people will ALWAYS be there when you need them. Many have found that group in The Apex Entourage. A powerful mastermind of like-minded, success-driven individuals.

To learn more about The Apex program, head over to www.jointheapex.com.

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